From Jacob our father’s work with great diligence for Laban the Aramean, we must learn that work has great value • Our Sages said that it was by virtue of his diligent labor that Jacob our father’s life was saved • One must teach children that it is very important for every person to work and support his family • The obligation to teach children a trade by which they can earn a living is from the Torah • Our Sages enacted that one should not get a haircut or launder clothing during the week in which Tisha B’Av falls • Those of Ashkenazic descent and some of Sephardic descent, including those from Morocco and Djerba and those who follow the Ari, are stringent regarding the prohibition of haircuts throughout all Three Weeks
How to Relate to People who Work and Talmud Torah
I will present two questions that came to me over the years, both concerning the same issue.
Q: My son studies in a Talmud Torah (Torah day school), and in the course of Torah study, the teacher explained to the children that every Jew needs to study Torah all day, and only after the fact, if one has no choice, should he go out to work. Did he teach correctly?
Question from a group of teachers in a Talmud Torah school: How should one correctly explain to children what is written in the Torah about Jacob our father, who worked for twenty years day and night? The children ask innocently: surely it would have been more fitting for Jacob our father to study Torah all day? And how is it possible that he was so absent from Torah study for so many years?
The Question Is the Answer
Sometimes the question is the answer. Instead of asking how it is possible that Jacob our father worked, one must state this as an answer — from the fact that Jacob our father worked with great diligence for Laban the Aramean, and the Torah elaborates on this at length, we must learn that work has great value, and therefore, even the greatest figures of the world engaged in it.
Moreover, Jacob our father had many reasons to be negligent in his work, since Laban the Aramean deceived him again and again, and yet Jacob our father worked honestly and faithfully in tending and caring for the flock. And so it is stated: “These twenty years I have been with you; your ewes and your she-goats have not miscarried, and I have not eaten the rams of your flock. That which was torn by beasts I did not bring to you; I bore the loss myself. You required it of my hand, whether stolen by day or stolen by night. There I was — by day the drought consumed me, and the frost by night, and my sleep fled from my eyes. These twenty years I have been in your house — I served you fourteen years for your two daughters, and six years for your flock, and you changed my wages ten times” (Genesis 31:38–41). By virtue of this, despite all of Laban’s deceptions, Jacob became very wealthy, as it is stated: “And the man grew exceedingly prosperous, and he had many flocks, and female servants and male servants, and camels and donkeys” (Genesis 30:43).
There was no failing whatsoever in his diligent labor — on the contrary: our Sages said (Bereishit Rabbah 74:12) that it was by virtue of Jacob our father’s diligent labor that his life was saved, for when Laban the Aramean pursued him to kill him and plunder his property, God saved him thanks to his being diligent in his work: “Work is more beloved than the merit of the ancestors, for the merit of the ancestors saved property, while work saved lives. The merit of the ancestors saved property — as it is stated: ‘Were it not for the God of my father, the God of Abraham and the Fear of Isaac, you would have surely sent me away empty-handed.’ And work saved lives — as it is stated: ‘God saw my affliction and the toil of my hands, and He rebuked you last night.'”
The Obligation to Teach a Trade
Beyond our obligation to teach the Torah, and not to decide which verses we find appealing, and which we do not, one must also teach children that it is very important for every person to work and support his family, for our Sages stated in the Mishnah (Kiddushin 29a) that it is obligatory for a father to teach his son a trade — that is, a profession. Rabbi Yehudah added that whoever does not teach his son a trade, it is “as if he teaches him to be a bandit,” since without the necessary tools for earning a livelihood, when he grows up and becomes independent, he will be forced to rob others in order to survive (Rashi ibid.). Indeed, fortunate is he who merits earning a living as a teacher, but most people are not suited to serve as teachers, and there is also a limit to the number of teachers a community needs — therefore, approximately 90 percent of people need to learn various professions so that they will be able to work in them, and support their families.
A Torah Obligation
The obligation to teach children a trade by which they can earn a living is from the Torah, as our Sages stated in the Mekhilta: “From here they said: From the Torah, a man is obligated to circumcise his son, to redeem him, to teach him Torah, to teach him a trade, and to find him a wife” (Mekhilta of Rabbi Ishmael, Bo, Tractate of Passover 18).
In the Jerusalem Talmud (Pe’ah 1:1), our Sages based the obligation to teach children a trade on the verse: “And you shall choose life” (Deuteronomy 30:19) — “life” meaning the ability to earn a livelihood, and to sustain oneself. And in the Babylonian Talmud (Kiddushin 30b), they based it on the verse: “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love” (Ecclesiastes 9:9). Our Sages in the Gemara explained: if the meaning of “wife” is literal, then “just as he is obligated to find him a wife, so too he is obligated to teach him a trade,” through which he will be able to earn a living and support their family. And if the word “wife” is meant to allude to the Torah, then “just as he is obligated to teach him Torah, so too he is obligated to teach him a trade,” for without a livelihood he will be unable to live and study Torah.
The Customs of the Prohibition of Haircuts During the Three Weeks
Our Sages enacted that one should not get a haircut or launder clothing during the week in which Tisha B’Av falls (Ta’anit 26b). Many of Sephardic descent likewise follow this practice, refraining from haircuts during the week in which Tisha B’Av falls, but getting haircuts before that (Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chaim 551:3).
Those of Ashkenazic descent and some of Sephardic descent, including those from Morocco and Djerba and those who follow the Ari, are stringent regarding the prohibition of haircuts throughout all Three Weeks (Rema 551:4; Kaf HaChaim 80; Kitzur Shulchan Aruch Toledano 387:8; Brit Kehunah 2:12).
Those who immigrated from Tunisia, Algeria, and Libya are stringent from Rosh Chodesh Av (based on the Mahariy Ayyash).
Who Is Permitted to Get a Haircut
All the hair on the body is included in the prohibition. However, when the mustache interferes with eating it is permitted to trim it, and likewise, one whose grown hair is causing him headaches, or who has sores on his head, may get a haircut during these days (based on Shulchan Aruch 551:12–13; 531:8; Mishnah Berurah 21; and Biur Halacha there). A woman is permitted to trim the hair of her head when, due to its length, it has begun to emerge from her head covering, and likewise, a woman is permitted to remove from her face and body hairs that detract from her appearance (Mishnah Berurah 79; Kaf HaChaim 47).
Those Celebrating a Joyous Occasion
In honor of a brit milah, when necessary, it is permitted for the father of the son, the sandak, and the mohel to get a haircut up until the week in which Tisha B’Av falls.
It is appropriate for a bar mitzvah boy not to get a haircut during these days, since he can get a haircut before the 17th of Tammuz. But the father of a bar mitzvah boy who is accustomed to shaving every day may shave in preparation for his son’s bar mitzvah celebration up until the week in which Tisha B’Av falls (see Peninei Halakha: Z’manim 8:8).
Shaving During the Three Weeks
For those who are stringent not to get haircuts throughout all Three Weeks, a question arose regarding shaving for one who is accustomed to shave. Some say there is no difference between shaving and a haircut, and just as it is forbidden to get a haircut, so too, it is forbidden to shave (Kaf HaChaim 551:66; 493:19). Many who are scrupulous in their observance of commandments follow this practice, to the point that not shaving during the Three Weeks has become for them one of the identifying marks of the mourning of the Three Weeks.
On the other hand, some hold that for those who are accustomed to shaving, shaving is not considered a festive occasion, but rather a routine act of removing an unsightly appearance, and the custom of not getting a haircut does not apply to them. An additional reason for leniency: those who are accustomed to shaving generally experience considerable discomfort when they do not shave for several days, and perhaps this is similar to the permission to trim a mustache that interferes with eating, and similar to the permission to anoint oneself on Tisha B’Av for one who has sores on his head (Shulchan Aruch 554:15). Similarly, Rabbi Schachter wrote in the name of Rabbi Soloveitchik (the book Nefesh HaRav, p. 191) that the custom of the Three Weeks follows the law of the year of mourning, during which one is permitted to shave; the custom of the Nine Days follows the law of the thirty-day mourning period, during which shaving is forbidden; and on Tisha B’Av the practice follows that of the seven-day mourning period. According to this, he was lenient regarding shaving every day until Rosh Chodesh Av, in order to remove the unsightly appearance.
In Honor of Shabbat
In preparation for Shabbat during the Three Weeks, some hold that it is even correct from the outset to shave, since otherwise, one enters Shabbat in an unsightly state. However, the Magen Avraham (551:14) wrote in the name of the Hagahot Asher that even in honor of Shabbat, one should not get a haircut during the Three Weeks, since one is not accustomed to getting a haircut every week. It follows that one who is accustomed to shaving every week should shave in honor of Shabbat (so wrote the Pri Megadim, O.C. 14, and this also emerges from the Biur Halachah 551:3 and Rabbi Akiva Eiger; see there).
However, from Rosh Chodesh Av, and even in preparation for Shabbat Chazon, according to the custom of Ashkenazic Jews and some Sephardic Jews, it is correct not to shave. And during the week in which Tisha B’Av falls, according to all opinions, it is forbidden to shave.
The Opinion of Rabbi Aharon Lichtenstein
In my book Peninei Halakha (Z’manim 8, note 7), I wrote in a footnote, based on what I understood from the words of Rabbi Shmuel David, may he live, rabbi of Afula (She’eilot U’Teshuvot Ner Ezra, vol. 2, pp. 155–158), that in the opinion of Rabbi Aharon Lichtenstein, it is correct to shave in preparation for Shabbatot during the Counting of the Omer and the Three Weeks.
However, last year I merited receiving a correction from his son Rabbi Moshe Lichtenstein, may he live, one of the heads of Yeshivat Har Etzion. He wrote as follows: “In principle, the leniency of the Rav [Soloveitchik] regarding shaving during the Counting of the Omer… applies equally to the Three Weeks. Indeed, the Rav ruled accordingly, to the best of my knowledge, for people in the Diaspora who work with non-Jews, even regarding weekdays.”
“However, my father, although he was well aware of this, thought that it is proper for one who is not among non-Jews, not to shave at all during the Three Weeks, not even in honor of Shabbat (‘the mourning for the Temple is different, as it is very intense’), and therefore, personally, he was accustomed to shaving on the eves of Shabbat during the Counting of the Omer, but not during the Three Weeks. And so he would rule for whoever asked him.
“Therefore, one who sees himself as following in the path of Rabbi Lichtenstein, should not shave on the eves of Shabbat during the Three Weeks.”
Subsequently, I found that Rabbi Shmuel David also wrote that initially Rabbi Aharon Lichtenstein followed the practice of his father-in-law (the Rav), “but in later years he found ‘a basis not to shave,’ and refrained greatly from shaving during the Three Weeks, even in preparation for Shabbat.”
Aerobics Class
Q: Is it permitted to hold an aerobics class during the Three Weeks until Rosh Chodesh Av for the purpose of exercise, or is this considered dancing and music which are forbidden?
A: Since the primary purpose is for exercise — it is permitted, on condition that they play rhythmic music there and not songs, since playing songs at the volume appropriate for an aerobics class creates a sense of joy, and in order to make clear that there is a difference from the rest of the year, one should play rhythmic music without a melody.
This article appears in the ‘Besheva’ newspaper and was translated from Hebrew.
