When Purim falls on Friday, the custom is preferably to begin the meal before noon * If one didn’t manage, it’s acceptable to start after noon and finish before sunset * Another custom is to combine the Purim feast with the Friday night Sabbath meal * The joy of Purim is the greatest joy * This commandment was observed even when the Jewish people were in harsh exile * Especially in Purim’s joy there is an answer to suffering, since in Purim we learned that even evil will eventually turn to good
When Purim falls on Friday, the custom is preferably to begin the meal before noon, out of respect for the Sabbath. And one who didn’t manage to begin the meal before noon should try to start it at least three hours before sunset (Maharil, Rema 695:2). If necessary, one can begin after this time and finish before sunset, but should eat less to be able to eat the Friday night meal with appetite
The “Spread a Tablecloth and Make Kiddush” Custom
Another custom is to combine the Purim feast with the Friday night Sabbath meal. The practice is as follows: Pray the afternoon (Mincha) prayer before the meal, begin the meal on Purim day, and about half an hour before sunset welcome the Sabbath by lighting Sabbath candles, spread a tablecloth over the bread and make Kiddush over wine for Shabbat. Since the blessing over wine was already made during the Purim feast, the blessing ‘borei pri ha’gefen’ (“who creates the fruit of the vine”) is skipped in Kiddush. After Kiddush, the meal continues, and a k’beitza (an egg-sized portion) of bread is eaten, or at least a k’zayit (an olive-sized portion), for the sake of the Sabbath meal. At the end of the meal, “May it please You” (Retzeh) is said in the Grace After Meals, and “For the Miracles” (Al HaNissim) is added within the “May the Merciful One” (HaRachaman) section at the end of Grace After Meals. After the meal, the evening prayer is recited (Peninei Halakha: Z’manim 16:15).
Is This Custom Preferred?
Some say that one may follow the “spread a tablecloth and make Kiddush” custom as a first choice (Meiri Ketubot 7a). Some even prefer to practice this way because it’s difficult for them to move the meal to the morning, or because in the morning they don’t have an appetite for a large meal, and if they postpone the meal until afternoon they won’t have an appetite for another meal on Friday night. Some want to follow this custom because they want to enhance the mitzvah of sending gifts (mishloach manot) throughout the morning and afternoon as in other years. However, others say that the “spread a tablecloth and make Kiddush” custom is not ideal, both because it disrupts the order of Sabbath entry (Kaf HaChaim 271:22, based on the Arizal), and because due to doubt, “For the Miracles” is only said within the “May the Merciful One” section of Grace After Meals. Additionally, this custom might interfere with preparations for Shabbat, including bathing and preparing the home and Sabbath foods. Furthermore, this custom combines the Purim feast with the Friday night meal, and it’s preferable to give each meal its own special place. In practice, those who wish to observe the meals according to the “spread a tablecloth and make Kiddush” custom may do so, but for those without a preference, it’s better to hold the Purim feast around noon, prepare properly for Shabbat, and after prayers in the synagogue, conduct the Friday night Sabbath meal.
The Joy That Evil Will Turn to Good
Q: How can we rejoice in Purim this year when there are still hostages in captivity? Wouldn’t it be appropriate for rabbis to call for limiting Purim celebrations as a sign of solidarity with the hostages and their families?
A: It is a mitzvah to rejoice on Purim, and this mitzvah was observed even when the Jewish people were in harsh exile and suffered hardships infinitely greater than our suffering. On the contrary, especially in Purim’s joy there is an answer to suffering, since in Purim we learned that even evil will eventually turn to good, and therefore the joy of Purim is the greatest joy. It’s worth noting that emphasizing the suffering of the hostages and their families over the suffering of hundreds of bereaved families and all the severely wounded is very hurtful. Beyond that, this discrimination is dangerous because it might encourage hostage exchange deals that could cause the deaths of additional soldiers and civilians, as has already happened.
Miracle through Natural Means
Another reason for the special joy of Purim is that the miracle occurred through natural means, and a miracle that comes through natural means expresses a greater illumination to the world. The divine light is revealed only in what is above nature, but in natural reality the divine illumination is not revealed, and when the miracle comes naturally through Ahasuerus, Esther, and Mordechai, it becomes clear that God directs the entire world and orchestrates everything for the benefit of Israel and their redemption. As the Alter Rebbe explained the words of the Sages (Jerusalem Talmud Megillah 1:5): that the prophets and writings are destined to be nullified while the Scroll of Esther and the laws of the Oral Torah are not destined to be nullified. He explained that this doesn’t mean they will be nullified, but that the illumination coming from them will not be considered significant compared to the illumination revealed from the laws and from the Scroll of Esther, because the illumination that is clothed in natural means, through Ahasuerus and the entire story of the Megillah, as well as the illumination revealed through practical law, is an illumination “from very high levels” (Torah Or ‘Yavi’u Levush’ 90d-91a). He further explained that although through obvious miracles there is a more distinct and clear divine revelation, from the perspective of superiority, “the miracles clothed in nature – are from a much higher place” (ibid, ‘Chayav Inish’ 100a). Because this way it becomes clear that everything that happens in the world is through God’s direction, who orchestrates everything.
Redemption through Natural Means
There are opponents of Zionism who claim that Redemption, meaning the Ingathering of the Exiles and Settlement of the Land, should come from God with signs and wonders. They learned this from the plain meaning of verses, that God is the one who will gather the exiles and settle the Land, as it is said: “Then the Lord your God will restore your fortunes and have compassion on you and gather you again from all the nations where He scattered you. Even if you have been banished to the most distant land under the heavens, from there the Lord your God will gather you and bring you back. He will bring you to the land that belonged to your ancestors, and you will take possession of it. He will make you more prosperous and numerous than your ancestors” (Deuteronomy 30:3-5). And it is also said: “I will take you out of the nations; I will gather you from all the countries and bring you back into your own land” (Ezekiel 36:24). And likewise in additional verses in the Torah and Prophets. However, the Torah’s intention is that God will help Israel fulfill the commandment, since without God’s help no human effort will bear fruit. Just as we bless bread with “Who brings forth bread from the earth,” yet it is man who labors for bread through plowing, sowing, harvesting, threshing, winnowing, selecting, grinding, kneading, and baking. But since God created the earth and man, the wheat and the properties that allow bread to be made from it, it is considered that God is the one “Who brings forth bread from the earth.” Therefore, one should always remember that God is the one who gave us the ability to understand and act, and our role is to settle the Land through natural means with the powers He has given us.
Not to Nullify the Commandment of Settling the Land
If we don’t explain it this way, we would, God forbid, nullify the commandment that God commanded Israel to settle the Land, as it is said: “Take possession of the land and settle in it… You shall inherit the land…” (Numbers 33:53-54). And it is said: “You shall take possession of it and dwell in it” (Deuteronomy 11:31). So wrote Rabbi Tzvi Hirsch Kalischer in his book ‘Drishat Zion’ (Article 1): “The redemption of Israel that we are waiting for, let not the thinker think that suddenly the Lord, blessed be His name, will descend from heaven to earth, saying to His people ‘Go out!’ Or will send His Messiah suddenly from heaven to blow a great shofar for the scattered of Israel and gather them to Jerusalem, and will make for it a wall of fire and a sanctuary of God – will descend from the heights…” Rather, redemption will come through Israel awakening to go up to the land and settle it, and through this all the words of the prophets will be fulfilled in us.
When Adar Begins, Joy Increases
Our Sages said: “When Av begins, joy is diminished,” “When Adar begins, joy is increased” (Taanit 29a). Our Sages taught us through this that there is no coincidence in the world, and everything has its time, character, and nature. If the First Temple and the Second Temple were destroyed on the ninth of Av, it is a sign that the nature of the beginning of the month of Av is a time for calamity. And if the Purim miracle occurred in the middle of the month of Adar, it is a sign that the month of Adar has a special quality to turn evil to good.
Question about the Prohibition of Being a Soothsayer
One might question this guidance based on the prohibition of being a ‘soothsayer’ (me’onen), which is one of the prohibitions related to witchcraft, as it is said: “Let no one be found among you… who practices divination or sorcery” (Deuteronomy 18:10). And it is also said: “Do not practice divination or seek omens” (Leviticus 19:26). A soothsayer (me’onen), from the word ‘season’ (onah), is one who believes the words of sorcerers that there are good times and bad times, as our Sages said (Sanhedrin 65b): Who is a soothsayer? Rabbi Akiva explained: “This is one who calculates times and hours, and says: Today is good for going out, tomorrow is good for buying, wheat grown on the eve of the seventh year tends to be good.” One who sins in this way acts according to a superstitious belief that certain times are good and certain times are bad. And anyone who acts according to this, such as setting out on a journey based on the guidance of soothsayers, is liable to lashes (Rambam, Laws of Idolatry 11:9).
Guidance Based on Torah Concepts is Permitted
However, when guidance regarding times is based on our Sages who established their words according to Torah values, such as Adar in which Purim occurred, and Av in which the destruction occurred, there is no prohibition of being a soothsayer. Similarly, our Sages recommended that a widow marry on Thursday, since on that day a blessing was said for the fish (Ketubot 5a). Indeed, some hold that according to the Rambam one should not follow these guidelines and others like them (Maharsham 9:34; see Sho’el VeNishal Vol. 1, Yoreh De’ah 51). But most authorities have agreed to uphold them. As the Ritva explained (Taanit 29a), that in the months of Adar and Av there is a sign for Israel, “as has been decreed for us from heaven,” meaning this is not about the words of sorcerers and witches but about Torah guidance. Similarly, Tosafot and Maharsha (Taanit ibid.) wrote that although it was said that Israel has no astrological sign, merit is brought about through the meritorious and guilt through the guilty. Rabbi Eliyahu ben Chaim (Ra’anach), one of the early Acharonim in Turkey, explained that the soothsayer attributes his success to luck, but our Sages who said “merit is brought about through the meritorious” attribute success to God, “because on a good day God will also give, and the attribute of mercy prevails then, and on a bad day the opposite” (‘HaNoten Imrei Shefer’ p. 613).
